You know very little about television industry finance. You don't think I have enough money? How's this, Marie, I'll pay you $$$$$$ to tell the world that you think I'm a good person. That's right! The check is enclosed with this letter. Go ahead, cash it, it's real. But if you cash it, you better post this letter for everyone to see. That's right! Let both your readers know that Debra Barone can indeed afford to buy good people. You'll be the fourteenth. And there's plenty more where that came from!

Martha Stewart! HA! I could crush her! CRUSH her, Marie! Dick Cheney is a whole other kind of monster. But Martha Stewart's lunch meat to me.

Ray does what I tell him. Robert does what I tell him. Amy does what I tell her. And now, you do what I tell you.

First thing's first: post this letter, and put a lot of dollar signs over the amount. I don't want the rest of the Debra Barone pitchforks and torches mob to each demand the same amount. And start calling yourself Marie. Of course, you'll also have to stop posting that picture.

I've brought it on, Marie, and now I've bought you.

Keep the receipt,

Debra

PS: I admit it, I hate cats. I'd strangle one, no problem.