Welcome back! Not you, me. Welcome back home, me! Did you enjoy your three-week holiday hiatus in Miami? (Yes!) Are you glad to be home? (Yes.) Are you going to stay in town for the next few months, leaving the house only for the occasional meal and perhaps to argue with the old man down the block who insists that you mow your lawn every three weeks even when the grass is under four inches of snow? (Not exactly).

Actually, I feel like I'm not really home so much as I have a fairly long layover at home before hitting the road again. The good ol' Pittsburgh Steelers are progressing in the playoffs and travelling to Indianapolis, as their unofficial -- and, truth be told, unknown even to the team -- mascot, I'm going, too! The in-laws got tickets to a playoff game, so that's one more weekend of leaving the o'wife to fend for herself. No, I'm not evil. Y'see, she actually encouraged me to go to the game. "It's the playoffs!" she said. Paddy O'Wife o'rocks!

Speaking of the o'wife, she mentioned a rather interesting tidbit that I'm surprised I didn't catch earlier. As you can see in the previous paragraphs and posts, whenever I'm making fun of her cultural heritage (the one Irish quarter, at least), I throw an o' in front of a word. But when she makes fun of my cultural heritage (the four Hispanic quarters), she throws an o at the end of a word.

What an o'pairo we o'make-o.

You may think the scales are unbalanced because you're always reading my side of things, but trust me on this one, she enjoys an equal share, and maybe even a bit more. In fact, it's embarassing going to the mall with her because if she sees someone that she suspects is Hispanic, she'll demand to see their green card. Come to think of it, that's the second thing she said to me when I got off the plane. "Welcome back! Where's your greeno cardo!?"

Okay, nothing in that last paragraph is actually true. I usually leave it to everyone to pick up my "I'm making all this up" tone, but I didn't want to chance it. I don't want the o'wife to receive o'hatemail, especially since she's so understanding about post-season priorities. Who needs groceries for two weeks? Buy a ticket to the Indy game!

Ah, it's good to be home... for a few days, at least.

I'm going to wear this outfit to the game. You likes?

Today is "Wensday!" At least, that's how it should be spelled.